You're Not A Monster You're A Human (Shizuo Heiwajima x Reader)
by CharactersXReaders
Summary: Shizuo Heiwajima a crazy tempered man with crazy strength, but maybe he's got a cute side...Only one way to find out! You're goin in! Yes I mean you! This is a Shizuo Heiwajima x Reader, so uh read and enjoy ! Mini summary- Shizuo is crazyy ! But when you get hurt because of him, can he pick up the pieces and forgive himself? (For SeaShinobi !)
1. Chapter 1

You and Shizou were dating, and despite his temper, despite his unnamed anger at the world, you did you love him. You'd never let him go a day with out hearing you say it. But what happened wasn't his fault. Not to you anyways. But to Shizou life would have been better for you had you never stumbled upon him that day,

_"Hey, you alright?" _He remembered it like it was yesterday, _"you got pretty banged up but I don't think the fountain is the best place to wash off your cuts, tough guy." _He remembered your beautiful laughter, _"come on, I'll take you back to my place, get you cleaned up in water that isn't filled with pocket change." _The way you weren't afraid of him like everyone else was...Normally that would have been a bad thing to him, not being able to dominate someone..But if you were afraid of him he probably would have burst into tears were he sat. _"__What? Scared of a girl? Come on get up sunglasses." _He didn't want you to get hurt. "_You know who I am don't you?" _He knew asking this may lead to your going away but what else could he have done. _"Of course I do! Why, you're Shizou Heiwajima!" _The way you spoke to him like you knew what was coming but you didn't care. _"Aren't you scared I'm gonna beat you up?"_ He asked shocked. "_Don't be stupid. Stupid."_ Your voice was stern then but playful too something about it made him want to smile..._"You're human. Not a monster. I'm only scared of monsters. Not __humans." _

* * *

**Haha~! Hiiii everyone~! I gave you a cliff hanger on the first chapter? MUWAHAH! Ahah kidding~! But this whole chapter save for the first paragraph is a flash back on the way you met him so like...I thought I could have left it as is, hope you don't mind I'll update this one extra soon~! (His name was spelled so many different ways on so many different websites that I actually was contemplating shooting myself xD kidding, but really tell me if I spelled it wrong and I'll change it xD)**

**I'll make your heart go 'Doki Doki' ~XReader**


	2. The Portrait Painter

_"Shizou~!"_  
You say in a sing song voice as you knock on his door. He sighs as he opens the door and allows you inside. "Hey," he nods as you walk  
inside.  
"You could show _some_ enthusiasm." You raise your eye brows at him.  
"Why?" He asks tilting his head.  
"I don't know, we are dating aren't we?" You mutter looking at him while crossing you arms and tapping your foot.  
"What?" He looks at your expression.  
"Do I have to do _everything_ myself?" You step forward and hug him, "you could have looked up how to make a girl happy on the internet or something." You mutter closing your eyes as he slowly but surely begins to hug you back, "you lack experience." You sigh.  
"Well it's usually just a one night thing, I don't see them the next day." He explains.  
"Well it's been a_ 2 month_ thing with us you could try a little." You pout softly into his chest.  
"Right I apologize.." He sighs resting his chin on you head. "There we go.." You smile and chuckle a little as you make him rock around from foot to foot in a circle. He was too tough to show you his cute side, but you knew he had one.  
"I think we should go out and do something today!" You smile.  
"Like what?" He asks as you let go.  
"Let's find a portrait painter in the park!" You grab his hand and run outside.  
"Hey!_ Slow down!_ You're gonna trip!"  
"I am not! Haha faster Shizou faster!" You urge him forward running until you stop at the park gates.  
"Come on I'll _walk_ now! Let's find a portrait painter!"  
You smile walking down the cobble stone path.  
"You could_ try_ and be a little more_ affectionate_.." You mutter seeing his hand in his pocket.  
"What?" He looked over.  
"Nothing! I was just talking to myself." You laugh.  
"You don't needa talk to yourself...I am here after all.." He murmurs taking his hand out of his pocket and intertwining your fingers with his.  
_"Thanks.._"  
He lets go of your hand and puts his arm around your shoulder instead, you reach your hand up and hold his hand which was dangling above the side of your chest. You smile up at him and he blushes a little bit, "you're welcome.." H murmurs taking a step towards you.  
_"I found one!"_ You run up the the portrait painter he was an old man who had just completed  
a portrait of a mother and her daughter as they paid the man looked up at you, "a couple portriat, I'd love to." He smiles as he guestures to a  
wooden box, "have a seat."  
Shizou sits down first and you tilt your head quizically, "there's only_ one._" You point.  
"Share." You look at Shizou and plop down on his lap, "kay~." You smile and wrap your arms around his neck.  
"How lovely, I remember when my wife and I were like that.." He laughs softly as he begins to draw, "how long have you to been dating?" He asks as he pulls our some new paints.  
"Two months.." You and Shizou speak at once._ "Jinx._ Double jinx!" You laugh and hug him tighter.  
"I see, how happy then. I've always liked young love." He says happily. You sit in comfortable silence as he works on the picture, he asks a question here and there or you do but nothing really eventful happened.  
"Here you go."  
He smiled as he handed you a canvas. "Oh _wow!_ This is amazing, Shizou look!" You wave him over.  
"Well would you look at that.." He wraps his arms around your shoulders from behind, "the you in the picture is _almos_t as pretty as you in real life." He said happily. You lean onto him and smile, "how much?" You ask the man smiling brightly.  
"Uh-Uh No charge. It's a_ gift._." He shakes his head.  
"No, no! I have to give you something!" You say shocked. "Just keep being happy, that's all." He smiles at you.  
"Well thank you very much!" You move and Shizou moves his arms for a moment. "No promblem, come and visit any time." He smiles at you.  
"I certainly will..._Bring it in_."  
"I-I what?"  
_"Bring it in._" You open your arms.  
"Come on." You wave towards yourself. He hugs you, "thank you very much." You say happily.  
"You're welcome.." He smiles.  
"I'm here everyday. Stop by whenever you need help." He pats your shoulder.  
"Thank you." You bow lowly and you and Shizou set off hand in hand again.  
"That was nice.." You each murmur walking away. "But you aren't allowed to hug other guys, I'll get jealous." He says smartly.  
"Maybe that's a good thing.." You chuckle softly.

* * *

**I've been sick lately ): I'm sorry I've been mega super siickkk blah but here's where it all starts! Hope you liked it now that I'm better things may get done faster, maybe if I had someone to push me and remind me of all the things I needa update...hint hint..anyone up for the task?**

**I'll make your heart go 'Doki Doki' ~XReader**


	3. Gonna Kill Him!

"Stay over tonight?" Shizuo asks turning to look at you.  
"Hm? Sure." You shrug lazily.  
"I just need to drop something off at my apartment, I don't wanna lug around my laptop so I'll be right back." You smile at him. You lean up and kiss him sweetly then run out of his home.

"This her?"  
"I'm certain she was with him in the park yesterday."  
"Well we know where she is we're on her tail what do we do?" "  
Get her and bring her to Izaya?"  
"He said he wanted 'to scare Shizu-chan.' Isn't nabbing his girl the best way to do it?"  
"You're right let's go."

"I was sure I put my key in this pocket.." You murmur rummaging around in you coat. "Ah her-" Something hit's your head hard and you land on your front door step with a thud. "Let's get her."  
Shizuo begins to panic when you don't return to his place and decided to go look for you. He arrived on your doorstep and saw a note with trembling hands he snatched the note up. "We've got her~ Izaya~!" He clenches the note and rips it up. Tossing it into the bushes he storms off and looks for that idiot.  
_"I'm gonna kill him. Gonna kill him. Gonna kill him. Gonna kill him."_ He repeated as he walks down...sorry stomps down the street. "Going to fucking kill that bastard! He can throw things at me and act all superior _but he does not touch my girlfriend!"_ He growls clenching his fists and trying to calm himself down.

You wake up in a poorly lit room. "Uhm...Shizuo?" You look around.  
"Sorry wrong answer~ My names Izaya, and you must be (Y/N)~!" A black haired man, Izaya smiled at you.  
"He said he only liked older girls but from what I see here you're a year younger than he is..This'll make him tick.." Izaya chuckles. "Oh yes~ He's gonna be so mad. But he'll be out of my hair...He wants me out of Ikebukuro and I want him out I think I've won this one.." He laughs violently as he walks away.  
Fear feels like it's gone and replaced to blood running through your veins as your heart beats roughly in your chest, you're breathing quickens to harsh pants and ragged cries. "You know I don't wanna have to do this, such a young pretty girl...but the bosses orders not mine and he wants Shizuo gone more than I do." Izaya laughs to himself as he returns and sits across from you. _"But I'm afraid if Shizu-chan doesn't leave I'll have to kill you."_

* * *

**Haha some suspense with school starring up I've been doing HW...JKKKK I f************************ love ****sherlock~!**

**I'll make your heart go 'Doki Doki' ~XReader **


	4. H-E-I-W-A-J-I-M-A

"Whoa man calm down.." Masaomi put his hands up as Shizuo grabs him by his shirt collar.  
"Tell me you know where she is." Shizuo looked at him through his tinted glasses.  
"I don't know what you're talking about!" Masaomi shakes his head.  
"You're useless." He dropped the boy and stomped off. "Gonna kill him gonna kill him.."

"Come on, cry out for your hero, Shizu-chann~! Come save me~!" Izaya taunted.  
"Shut the fuck up." You turn your head and close your eyes. "He won't leave Ikebukuro, I won't let him, kill_ me._ Go a head." You stop your battle with the restraints.  
"I don't want to yet, I wanna have some fun with you.." He pulls out your phone.  
"Where'd you get that?!" You yell starting to wrestle in the chair's grip once more. "I don't know..I found it.." He smiled, "Oh a password..how tricky.." He murmured. "Let's see..." He whispered tapping his lips.  
"Oh I know! **_H-E-I-W-A-J-I-M-A.."_ **The room fills with a deep, satisfying click as your phone opens up.  
"Damnit.." You mutter  
. "Say hi to Shizu-chan!" He holds a camera in front of you.  
"Shizuo! Stay away from here!" You warn.  
"Aw pooo~ He can't though I need him to find you." Izaya retaliated. "Look at her face, twisted in fear...boys." Izaya tossed the camera to a group of really perverted looking men..."Good luck Shizu-chan~!" Izaya walked off into anther room. The camera stopped recording and the video was sen't to Shizuo.

"It's (Y/N)!" Shizuo dropped the civilian he was questioning and he scampered away. "Why can't I go there...I need to find her..." He fought a mental battle with himself forgetting his surroundings he.._.threw a mailbox and stomped off._

* * *

**GAH PLEASE DON'T HATE ME! I TOOK SO LONGGG I'M SORRY I LOVE YOU~! PLEASE FORGIVE ME! Okay so, how many Free! Iwatobi Swim Club fans do we have here? Hopefully a lot~! That show is the center of my new one shots~! I love Free! So look forward to that! (:**

**I'll make your heart go 'Doki Doki' ~XReader **


	5. You're Really A God Sent

"Back up boys, now's not the time for sex." Izaya stops them before they can touch you, he always seems to walk away but never really  
does...  
"Dip shit." You can't help but spit on his shoes.  
"What? I'm sorry I couldn't quite hear you...what was that?" Izaya leaned forward.  
"I said, Dip. Shi-" The room was filled with a loud smack and a sharp pain fills your cheek.  
"You're hurting my feelings..." He faked a pout.  
"You're hurting my face."  
"Pretty hurts."  
"You think I'm pretty?"  
"Not it the slightest."  
"No you said it you can't take it back."  
"Yes I can. I just did."  
"No you can't. You never did."  
"Yes I can."  
"Not."  
"Can!"  
"Not."  
"Yes I ca-"  
"-No-" Another whack filled the room. "Violence isn't the answer~." You warn in a scolding tone, "I mean honestly with a trait like that and an ugly face like your's how are you gonna ge-" Another whack.  
"Aww, I'm gonna bruise...now I'll think of you forever." You can't help but kick his shins.  
"That hurt..."  
"Yes so does my cheek, pattern?" You scoff.  
"Tell me when to stop." He begins repeatedly smacking your cheek the same one over and over.  
"You're-_slap_- Extremely!- _slap_- RUDE!" You shout snapping at his hands.  
"Oh oh oh..I'll sorry stop now...You gave me a headache I need an aspirin...try to find your girlfriend Shizu-chan~!" He drops your phone on  
your lap and you only scoff.

"He's hurting her!" Shizou bounces on his heels and shakes his white gloved hands out trying to conjure up a plan.  
"I've gotta get her gotta find her..." He leans against a sign.  
_"I CAN'T THINK OF ANYTHING! GAH_!" He shrieks kicking it in the air, "how useless I am...I can't even save her..." He slid down a wall. With great reluctance he picked up his phone,  
_'I'll do whatever you want...please just let her go...you haven't got the __right to bring innocent people into this..._" He tried to stay cool, you had only seen him lose his temper a few times and those weren't that bad...this was that bad.

"Oh, what were your words? 'He won't leave' was it? AH~! You were wrong wrong wrong I won~!"  
"He'll come back." You snap.  
"We'll kill you the minuet he does." Izaya snaps back just as fast.  
"You're bluffing."  
"I don't bluff."  
"You do now, bluff- **YOU LIKE HITTING ME DON'T YOU? YOU'RE HAVING A SHIT ****LOAD OF FUN AREN'T YOU?"** You yell wanting to cradle you bruising and swelling face.  
"I mean _honestly_...if you're gonna kidnap me make it look like I got kidnapped not like I angered a swarm of bee's and disturbed a mother bear's young.." You scoff again.  
"You've got a mouth on you." Izaya snapped.  
"Sorry~." The door burst open and Shizuo stood on the other side.  
"_(y/n)!"_ He ran up to you and held you in a rib crushing hug. "Shizu..."  
You stare wide eyed. "_Get out of here..._" You whisper.  
"Why? I've got you you're safe...we're going to go home after I do something for Izaya."  
"After you do something for him your home won't be able to be here in Ikebukuro.." You say gently.  
"I-I what?"  
**"Let. Him. Kill. Me."** You punctuate each word.  
"No! I can't! You said it yourself! I'm not a monster! Only a monster would leave you for dead! _You're a god sent!"_  
"I don't care what I am!  
_Let. Him. Kill. Me."  
_ "No! I won't let him! I'll do anything!" Shizuo yelled. "Let her go!" He looked at the raven haired man. "I won't stand for her physical pain, and her mental pains either. Take me instead..I deserve it more." Shizuo stepped forward.  
"No! No you can't leave! Don't let him win! He can't win! _YOU AREN'T THE MONSTER HE IS!"_ You shriek.  
"Shizou! If you leave...I'll-I'll...I'LL KILL MYSELF!" You shout.  
Shizou didn't move. "No, you won't." He didn't look at you.  
"Aw~ what a lovely display of affection...ma-" "I thought you were an information Broker or something! What's this all about?!" Shizou growls.  
"Just needed some extra money~ and I was bored.I love messing with you.."  
"You're always bored." Shizuo spat.  
"Shut up...Maybe I can make an exception for an old friend~."  
"We aren't friends, _**friends don't kidnap other friends girlfriends.**_" Shizuo hissed.  
"So you don't want my deal?"  
"No! I want it what is it I'll do anything!" Shizuo jumped up.  
"I'm getting paid for this job...So just pay me and you'll be in the clear." Izaya promised.  
_"In the clear...I'll pay anything!"_ Shizuo threw his wallet at the man untied you and held you tightly as he ran off.  
"Tell me, do you need to go to the hospital?" He asked holding you close.  
"_No.."  
_ "Are you sure?!"  
"I'm sure.." You nod closing your eyes. "  
Tell me if you change your mind!"

* * *

**Hmnnn, shit just got real! I have been watching an abudant amount of romance movies on Netflix so uhm...shits bout to get real!**

**I'll make your heart go 'Doki Doki' ~XReader **


	6. I Hate You!

Months pass and you see none of him, you sit on the same park bench, the one you tell him to go to everyday.  
_"...I need to stop coming here..."_ You whisper closing your eyes and seeing his smile. "I've caused him too much trouble..." You whisper. "He hates me." You had gone to his home countless time but he never opens the door. You've called him, he never pick up. You e-mail, no response. Maybe today will be the day. You couldn't bare the thought of him standing out here the day you give up all alone waiting for you looking sad, doing what you'd been doing every day. Tears spill down your cheeks.

**_"I hate you Shizuo Heiwajima!"_**

You burst into sobs and run down the streets. _"I hate him! I hate him!"_ You try to burn the words into your mind but you just can't. You bump into someone and land with a thud.  
"Oh whoa hey don't hurt yourself...oh whoa what's the matter? _Hey, you know pretty girls aren't supposed to look sad._" A man with chestnut hair holds out his hand.  
"I got stood up...I've been being stood up for the past 4 months..." You whisper.  
"Oh...Wow obviously that dude is _blind_...I'm sorry.."  
"No..no it's alright."  
"You can call me Shinra...Maybe I know the guy I could knock some hardcore sense into him for you alright?" He puts his arm around you and squeezes you. "You're so nice..." You sniffle. "I hate it when people cry..."  
"Shizuo Heiwajima...It's Shizuo...you probably don't wanna knock some ahrdcore sense in to him..but thanks for the offer.." You smile at him.  
"Your smile is beautiful." He smiled back. "It's...so he never left.." You watch Shizuo walk by giving you a lingering sideways glance.

**"Yo!"** Shinra turned. "You've got some nerve leaving this chick to cry the way she's been!"  
"I don't know what you're talking about."  
"Shinra...he hates me.._thank you for being so kind_...I've gotta get going!" Tears pour down your cheeks as you run away.

* * *

**I updated DAYS WITH MY LOVE finally xD I'm so lazy~! Well no more tests this week lucky me~! It's test season at my school I hate it literally I'm throwing a party once it ends no joke ahaha but I write in my down time~ UTAPRI SEASON THREE IS A THING~! 2015 I'M CRYING! ATTACK ON TITAN GETS AN ENGLISH DUB AND THE WORLD IS A HAPPY PLACE~! AJJDHSKDHUFDSAHJFIFDSDLKJFIDAFJLDJFHSADSH**

**is this what happiness feels like? JUST KIDDING AHAHAH I'M HAPPY EVERYDAY WHEN I SEE ALL OF MY READERS LOVELY REVIEWS AND E-MAILS**

**I'll make your heart go _'Doki Doki_' ~XReader**


	7. Saying Goodbye

You lean against an old fence trying to clear your head, and feel pressure on your back...

His cigarette was set ablaze flickering orange and black, he took a long drag and blew out a puff of smoke.  
_"She hated it when I smoked.."_ He murmurs. He looks up at the sky, sunglasses discarded, he just wanted to watch the stars. He felt an equal amout of pressure on his back. And knew who it was instantly.  
"What are you doing here?" Shizuo asked.  
You turn and wrap your fingers in the fence leaning against it.  
"We dated for a long time I know where you like to relax.." You whisper. "And...I wanted to see you."  
"Why?" He hadn't seen you since...it happened..He was too afraid to face you, he had made you say things he never thought you'd say, you were willing to take your life...he couldn't face you...he couldn't_ think about_ thinking about facing you.  
"Because I miss you; I miss you, don't you believe me?"  
"No." He turned though putting his trembling hands on yours, holding tightly as if you would dissapear from him again, this time for good.  
"Stop smoking, it'll kill you." You smack his cigarette away.  
"Right..." You stare deeply into his eyes.  
"I love you.." You whisper.  
"I love you too.." He drops your hands and walks away.  
"Then why are you running away huh?! Why? Why do you hate this world huh?! Why are you so angry with me?! Why? Why you afraid of everything?! Why don't you come back here and accept me! I'm not mad at you! _I CHOSE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU_!"  
You cry after him. "If you don't come back...I'll give up..." He doesn't turn. "Shizuo!"  
He turns.  
"I'll always love you!" He walks away.

You gave him the same location as every single day and sat there. Waiting, you could never give up on him..._ever_... Shinra passed by and shook his head hating Shizuo for this. "He's gonna regret it."  
'_I know you hate me...I'm sorry I disappointed you.'_ You text him one morning and set out to sit on the bench again. You didn't move.  
"...I...love him...I don't see...What did I do?"  
'_Guess I'll never know...Bye Shizuo I'm, leaving Ikebukuro on tomorrow. Forever. I'll always love you __more than anybody I meet.'_ You text him only that.

The next day you sit on the bench until you had to leave for the train station your suitcase next to you, slowly being drenched by the  
pouring rain, sitting in the grayscale feeling that caused your tears, and the grayscale feeling coming with the rain that masked them.  
"It always rains on days like this huh?" You whisper closing your eyes. "Doesn't he even wanna say goodbye?"  
"Yo! (Y/N)! You leaving?!" Shinra ran over to you holding his coat above his head.  
"Yeah! In about an hour or so! I don't think he's gonna show...but...Maybe just a few more minuets, ya know?!"  
"No...Not really..._but hey_...Celty and I wouldn't mind a new roommate if it comes to that, call me if you need any help when you get where you're going  
alright. _I'll miss you (y/n)._ I'm sure everyone will." Shinra kissed your forehead and ran back to the haven of an old bakery awning.  
"Goodbye (y/n)! I hope you can one day find _true happiness_ without him! I know he really will miss you! I also know that he loves you! I also know he'll  
regret his choices! Enjoy your knew life! And don't forget to stay in touch with the gang back here in Ikebukuro!"  
"Thank you Shinra! Really, thank you! _I can't ever repay your kindness!_ And don't worry I could never forget you guys!"  
You yell back to him as he smiles and walks into the bakery.  
A while passed and Shizuo was a no show.

* * *

**Mhn~ *^* sadness for a bit longer please bare with me! Hahaha xD any Attack On Titan fans reading? Hear about the DUB coming up? I did~! *^* P excited**

**I'll make your heart go _'Doki Doki_' ~XReader**


	8. Thank You For Being You

The next day he sees his phone, panics and he opens it. _'Never?'_ His eyes widen. He grabs an umbrella and sprints outside, "Never?" "Leaving?" "Forever?" His mind was a terrible whirlwind of nervous thoughts as he ran not having time to open his umbrella, but he wrestled with the opening hatch in the streets. He held the black umbrella still closed close to him a haven of some what. Knowing you you'd be in the rain drenched, he wanted to share this haven. It was too late you were just getting up and gathering your things.  
"Good bye Shizuo Heiwajima!" You start to cry.  
"Thank you for some of the_ happiest times of my life_...and thank you..._for being you._." You were beyond soaked now, but just a little further to the train station and you could change there.

* * *

**Sorry I've been slow but it was my Birth-day saturday and I had a party and stuff #~# people are loud ^3^ I was writing at like 3 AM on my phone when people started falling asleep they're bad but I may work on them more they're SOULEATER one shots and I love SOULEATER so I really wanna write for it**

**I'll make your heart go _'Doki Doki_' ~XReader  
**


	9. I Can't Go Through With This!

_"(Y/N)! Wait!"_ Shizuo ran to the bench and stopped when he saw it empty resting his hands on his knees and panting "I...I'm too late...I..." He sat on his knees shoving his hands into the fabric covering his thighs. "I'm such an-"  
"Hey ass hole!" Shinra had bought an umbrella. "The train station! I _really_ don't want you to think I forgive you! You're _still_ an asshole!"  
"Thanks!"  
"Ass _holeee!_" Shinra waved walking away.  
So, Shizou stumbled and fumbled over his own to feet running at full speed toward the train station, shoving people and jumping over small children, oh yes..he did break a few things..

The warm air in the station welcomed you you like an old friend as you step inside.  
"(Y/N)! You don't have to look at me! Just..._I'm sorry!"_ You jump at Shizuo's voice.  
"Shizuo..._please_..It's fine. You're not happy. So this is what's for the best!" You yell back.  
"No! I can't go through with this! (Y/N) where are you! I _love_ -" "-_I did too!_ But if you aren't happy with me... _You no longer have to suffer._ I can only hope you'll find better!" You cut him off. "  
There's no better than th-"  
" Then if you lost the best, I just...I hope you can find at_ least_ happiness in the arms of another, Shizuo!" You start to cry, _"Really I do!_"  
"You were the best anyone ever could have asked for! I just need _a do-over_ to prov-"  
"-I know...I do! But..I'm leaving! _Don't beat yourself up about Izaya!" _You shake your head, you drenched, dark (h/c) warped and bouncing because of their soaked state. You train was boarding, and Shizuo panicked.

_Was he going to lose you?_

* * *

**Srry been so lazy lately *_* please don't hate me..xD I've been derpin round the interwebs looking for inspiration I've had like a creative block lately so meh~ Urgggghhh ~_~ so tieredddd yet sooooo ****boreddddd so I wrote this shitty thing hope you still like it despite my sleepiness~!**

**I'll make your heart go _'Doki Doki_' ~XReade  
**


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